" empty nest " The phenomenon entangles the middle aged colony Before worrying the sorrow of parting initiates the psychological injury

" empty nest " The phenomenon entangles the middle aged colony Before worrying the sorrow of parting initiates the psychological injury
Refer to " empty nest " The phenomenon, a lot of people will expect at first it is the elderly's patent, but the reporter finds in the interview the similar phenomenon reflects very generally in a lot of middle aged colonies. The child goes out to go to school, work even get married, parents, as the middle aged colony has got back to " the two people's world " quickly from the 3 member family ,The sound not so happy as child's noise and excitement in the past, the family becomes quiet. They go to school for every day such as child no longer reading worry about, day became idle suddenly. The topic that no longer grows up around the child at the same time conflicts or compromise, there are few topics among couple. Because of a great deal of change of life, initiate a series of question, lose, inanition, loneliness, feeling of loneliness go to by chance.
Phenomenon The child goes out
Difficult adaptation of parents' psychology
Citizens Mr. Taos' child was admitted to a university of Hubei Wuhan 3 years ago, the child reads great four this year. In the past few years, though he and wife are also working, always thinks what are lacked at one's side after getting home, seem uninteresting to live.
Reporter visit find the child of people that born around the 1961, some go study abroad abroad, it go to the college outside the province some, at work, if you can't get married, get married already at other places graduate student, others. Have got back to the lively 3 member family quickly as parents and others " Two people's world " ,The sound not so happy as child's noise and excitement in the past, the family becomes quiet. They go to school for every day such as child no longer reading worry about, day became idle suddenly. The topic that no longer grows up around the child at the same time conflicts or compromise, there are relatively few topics among couple. Live in this kind of environment, parents can't help sampling to the bitterness of separating with the child.
Question Before worrying about the sorrow of parting Bring the psychological injury
This kind of feeling of parents', it is " empty nest " of the typical middle age in the view of some psychological workers Manifestation of the phenomenon. Lanzhou awaken psychological snow flake Zhao, teacher of psychological consultation, of advisory organization claim said " the empty nest " under life Generally refer to the children old married couple after leaving home. With the growing up and going out to study, work, get married of the first group of only-children, as such " The empty nest " There are more and more crowds, the parents will go through similar life in middle age one and numerous. Guard " empty nest " alone Married couple is be psychological without being produced diagonosis of disorder, this often last family " the nests empty " Syndrome. This kind of syndrome and main symptom is that the mood is gloomy, depressed, lonely and losing, will initiate appetite lowering, sleep lacking proper care and depression some time later, will cause some psychological diseases when being serious. Some people will also present the inclination of feeling guilty, think that has places unfair to children oneself, have not totally tried the responsibility for doing parents. In addition, too can initiate parents blame inclination of children, think it is unfilial to their for children to go out, just think of one's own interests and let it kept alone " The empty nest " .
Good recipe The society adjusts Innovation of living needs
The psychological consultation teacher claims, should get rid of the family " empty nest " The influence of syndrome, the party should establish new family relationship from the thought as soon as possible, lighten, have a sentimental attachment for to the intersection of children and excessive psychology, as soon as possible weight of family relationship by original longitudinal relation Turn to the horizontal relation (couple and friend partnership) in the future ,The intensity of the appropriate emotion input on offering to children originally is adjusted, reducing oneself requires children to reciprocate parents' expectation level. Parents should try hard to train children to get used to showing consideration for parents, substantiate the new life content in time, for example collect some hobbies many years ago again, find the new role substituting it as soon as possible, establish new interpersonal relationships, adjust the life style, participate in various social activities and public beneficial and work etc..
Talk about the middle age " The empty nest " The colony substantiates the topic of the new life content, a psychological consultation teacher has told such a scene: There are a pair of middle aged married couple, since children worked and got married in the other places 4 years ago, husband and wife will invite some partners with a common goal every festivals or holidays, climb together, while enjoying beautiful scenery of nature, taking exercises makes spirit joyful again. In addition, husband and wife participate in some friend have a get-together frequently also, through interchange, link up in friend, substantiate one's own life.
The intersection of psychological consultation and teacher this claim, people often speak the innovation of need of work, he thinks the family life is the same, need to innovate constantly too. (Zeng WuTong Xie HaiXia)
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